Let go, let go, let go

I’ve been busy of late in places other than the blogosphere. Like going to my 50th high school reunion, visiting friends and family in Ontario, taking on the role of chair of the communications committee in my gated community here in Florida.

I’ll start with the reunion, spread out like an Indian wedding over a wonderful three days in rural northern New York State. In a small town small school, everyone knows everyone, the years didn’t matter. We picked up with each other almost where we left off fifty years ago. At the banquet on Saturday night in the Catholic Church Hall I was honored to receive the Alumnae of the Year award for my writing efforts to promote a more holistic approach to the treatment of schizophrenia.

What was not so amazing was the number of people in the room who came up to me later to share how they have been personally touched by schizophrenia. One man told me that my speech evoked a flood of memories of a favorite cousin who disappeared years ago. Another woman approached me to tell me that her daughter is doing graduate work in psychology, focusing on schizophrenia. Someone else wanted to order my book for the local library. Schizophrenia touches many lives.

The community newsletter that I’m putting out once a month has given me a chance to get to know my neighbors more. In theory, it should be easy. I just work off a template and wait for board members and others to send me their news. In reality, there are always small problems that need fixing. It’s vying for time with this blog.

A few weeks ago, Chris and I began attending a metaphysical church where the emphasis is on awakening to the inspiration and guidance of spirit, focusing on healings, mediumship, and embracing the teachings of all Master Teachers.

The church also offers courses based on A Course in Miracles, the words of Jesus transcribed over many months by Helen Schucman, a professor of medical psychology at Columbia University. The book was published in 1975 by The Inner Peace Foundation. It’s essentially an instructional device in how to love (become whole), by letting go of the fear and delusional thoughts to which our ego clings. “It teaches that the way to universal love and peace—or remembering God—is by undoing guilt through forgiving others. The Course thus focuses on the healing of relationships and making them holy.”

only the mind can be sick, only the mind can be healed. Only the mind is in need of healing; we must change our mind about the “reality” of illusions; there is no such thing as “sin” (there are only errors (in thought) that we must correct; Illness of any kind may be defined as the result of the view of the self as weak, vulnerable, evil and endangered, and thus in need of constant defense; while truth is simple, it must stil be taught to those who have already lost their way in endless mazes of complexity. This is the great ill.

And what then is my error in thought in this journey of healing? That I did not put full trust in the healing power of the Universe (God, if you will) to let go of my fear that the result would be inferior to the result that I wanted. My ego knew this was a error that I was hoping I wouldn’t have to correct one day. I carried on nonetheless, endlessly trying new therapies that got closer to God in many respects (music and vibration) without callng on him by Name, in the hope that I almost singlehandedly could lead Chris to taking responsiblity to heal himelf. I was giving an intellectual nod to God that he obviously was important, except I wasn’t treating Him like he was. Where was the mysterious hand of God in all of this?

Recalling Level 5 of Dr. Dietrich Klinghardt’s healing pyramid, where I started off years ago:

Level 5:
The 5th level is the plane of self-healing. I call this level
the “spirit body”. The only relationship that exists here is the
relationship between the individual and god. The fifth level
is this part of God that reaches into us and wants to learn and
experience the physical word through this individual with all
his or her flaws, strengths and idiosyncrasies. A physician,
psychologist, or guru who claims that he can be helpful on
the 5th level is being arrogant, misleading, dangerous and
simply wrong. Anyone who truly has experienced this level
will have an attitude of deep respect and understands that it
cannot be explained using language. People that talk often
about “god”, “angels” and other spiritual experiences are suspicious to me. People too deeply involved in the “New Age”
often have significant unresolved family issues or guilt (that
is either taken on from another family member or “earned”
through one’s own mistakes). The pain and necessary healing work is often avoided by involving oneself in extensive
spiritual practices that never seem to resolve the real issues.
Treatment:
Any exploration of this level is left to the patient.
As practitioners we have no right to intrude on this plane.
An attitude of great respect and humbleness is appropriate. Interfering would be saying: “the part of God that
works through me ( the practitioner) is more important or
healed then the part of God you (the client) represent”.

I’m still around, I’m still interested in helping Chris where I can, it’s just that I can’t do it all, have never wanted to do it all, and I’m more and more interested in finding my own peace by turning this over to Chris and his Father.

Let go and let God.

Today’s obituary

Daniel Johnston

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The Devil and Daniel Johnston is a 2005 documentary film about American musician Daniel Johnston. It chronicles Johnston’s life from childhood up to the present, with an emphasis on his experiences with bipolar disorder, and how it manifested itself in demonicself-obsession. The film was directed by Jeff Feuerzeig and produced by Henry S. Rosenthal

Daniel Dale Johnston (January 22, 1961 – September 10, 2019) was an American singer-songwriter and visual artist regarded as a significant figure in outsider, lo-fi, and alternative music scenes. Most of his work consisted of cassettes recorded alone in his home, and his music was frequently cited for its “pure” and “childlike” qualities.

Johnston spent extended periods in psychiatric institutions and was diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. He gathered a local following in the 1980s by passing out tapes of his music while working at a McDonald’s in Austin, Texas.His cult status was propelled when READ MORE

Psychosis and psychic powers

Schizophrenia and the Supernatural

By Esmé Weijun Wang January 30, 2019

To say this prayer—burn this candle—perform this ritual—create this salt or honey jar—is to have something to do when it seems that nothing can be done.”

One winter morning I shuffled a deck of oracle cards with my eyes closed, and I realized that despite the blackness, I could still see what was happening in front of me. Here were the details of my hands, with the movements of each finger, every twitch of every narrow knuckle, made plain; I could see the cards, which were not clear enough to distinguish completely, but showed their blurry, colorful faces in broad strokes. I decided to further test this ability by holding colored pens, randomly chosen from a pouch, before my shut eyes. The pen test indicated that I could also “see” the colors behind my lids—imperfectly, yes, but well enough to grasp whether I was looking at a light color or a dark one, and I called out the hot-pink one immediately.

Journaling and drawing divinatory cards had both become routine parts of my life earlier that year, when I was fighting psychosis and struggling to make the world cohere; I’d found that tarot and oracle cards offered a decent framework for structuring a fractured existence. read more here